sECret idENtities Cover

In honor of the new Asian American superhero comic sECret idENtites, I have decided to reveal my 5 quick and easy steps to becoming a real life Asian-American Superhero. As a child, I always wanted to be a superhero. And to a certain extent even right now with Batman Returns being such a hit, I get the craving to put on some tights, build a secret Lair, and yell at someone “We’re professionally through!” Anyway, I remember after watching the original Superman immediately climbing up on my roof with a trash bag, holding it like a cape, and jumping off. Spiderman on PBS inspired me to climb up the tallest jungle gym and jump to a lower rung like a spider. Indiana Jones had me grabbing a rope and jumping from tree to tree as I swung it like a whip.

…I did a lot of jumping off things as a kid. I guess what I’m saying is that maybe if I had an Asian superhero to idolize, I wouldn’t have gone to the emergency room as much. So for that reason alone, let me tell you a little bit about sECret idENtites.

This groundbreaking graphic anthology brings together leading Asian American creators in the comics industry—including Gene Yang (National Book Award finalist for American Born Chinese), Bernard Chang (Wonder Woman), Greg Pak (The Hulk), and Christine Norrie (Black Canary Wedding Special )—to craft original graphical short stories set in a compelling “shadow history” of our country: from the building of the railroads to the Japanese American internment, the Vietnam airlift, the murder of Vincent Chin, and the incarceration of Dr. Wen Ho Lee.Appealing to both comics fans and Asian Americans seeking to claim their place in American culture, Secret Identities makes brilliant use of the conventions of the superhero comic book to expose the real face of the Asian American experience.

Entertaining and enlightening, Secret Identities offers whiz-bang action, searing satire, and thoughtful commentary from a community too often overlooked by the cultural mainstream, while showcasing a vivid cross-section of the talents whose imagination and creativity is driving the contemporary comics renaissance.

The first story 9066 “centers around a Japanese American superhero who is sent into an internment camp after President Franklin D. Roosevelt signs Executive Order 9066 on February 19, 1942 in response to the attack on Pearl Harbor”. You can find out more about them on their website or you can drop them a comment at their MySpace page. They even have a preview on their website (PDF, 5.5 mb). And just like any other grassroots movement, they’ve made a YouTube video to get the word out to the masses. Check it out and pass it on. The book will be available in April 2009 — or you can pre-order your copy today on Amazon.com.

Now what you’ve all been waiting for, my 5 easy steps to becoming and Asian American Superhero:

1. Pick a power

No, being good at math is not a super power. I’m talking about getting a hold of some rare earth metal or meteor and getting some radiation poisoning. If I’ve learned anything from comics, getting radiation poisoning leads to superpowers. If for some reason, beyond my imagination, you can’t get your hands on radioactive materials, start thinking outside of the box. Maybe something closer to home that you have access to. …a talent or character trait that you can exploit …one that you can hone to a razor sharp edge. For instance, one year during college I was called Gas Man for my power to clear a room with my gas. I have also gone by Captain Save-a-Ho and Captain Cock-Block. Maybe you have heard of my good deeds.

2. Make a costume

When picking a costume, it is important to remember that this will become your identity. It will become the most recognizable aspect of your public profile. Your colors, they logo on your chest, they all come together to create your public image. Tights with your underwear on the outside is not only classic superhero but practical as well. With all the ass kicking and hair-raising experiences going on, you can be secure in the fact that you will never shit your underwear. But remember, you not only represent superheroes but Asians as well. So try to stay away from stereotypes such as a bowl hair cut. And if that bulge in your tights …is not so much a bulge but a lump, think of wearing a codpiece. Batman does it. Let’s try to not reinforce negative stereotypes.

Not X-Men but Y-Men

3. Get a Secret Identity

Luckily for us, a secret identity is not something we have to worry about. As we all know, all of us Asians look alike.

4. Get a secret Lair

This is an important but often overlooked step to becoming a superhero. Your lair is where you train. It’s where you do your research and more importantly do your much needed healing after long battles with your enemy who we define in step 5. You want it to be safe and for the most part impossible to find. For that reason, I have chosen a pho shop. Have you seen how many Pho restaurants there are in the San Gabriel Valley? Good luck finding that! And even if you do, open the secret door you have to sit at the right table with pull out the clean chopstick. Do you know how hard it is to find a clean chopstick in a Vietnamese restaurant? Hey, I’ve heard of more impractical things in comic books. “Look at me! I’m Superman. Now with my glasses on, look at me I’m Clark Kent. What a great disguise!”

5. Find an Arch Nemesis to fight, an injustice to right,  or a cause to champion

Finally, maybe the most important step to becoming a superhero, finding a great enemy. Your arch nemesis needs to be immediately revolting, an enemy that we can all despise and hate. Now this doesn’t have to be a real person. It’s actually easier to find weekly adventures if it’s not. It could be corruption, faceless corporate bullies, or some other sort of horrendous but relatable injustice. For instance, some of the personal adversaries that I have fought in the past have been: bad driving, eyes that don’t open all the way, and poor engrish. My current arch nemesis is taking a shot of alcohol without turning red.

So I say to you out there, good luck future Asian-American superheros of the future. The only caveat that is give is with great power comes great responsiblity. Please use this information only for good and not for evil.